jason christoper hartley

September 21, 2012

Gender Ternary Math

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jason Christopher Hartley @ 10:56 pm
There are two buttons:
  • Female
  • Male
There are three states:
  • MALE

A selected button becomes unselected when pressed again.

  • MALE = 1
  • FEMALE = 2
  • A = current gender
  • B = button pressed
    gender = Math.abs(A - B) + (A % B);

April 6, 2009

Propriety Fail

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jason Christopher Hartley @ 4:48 pm

I’ve been taking some online correspondence courses through the Army today to increase the points I get used to determine promotion. I just finished a course on offensive electronic warfare. The edition was dated 1994. Now I’m working on a course on copy editing. One topic covered in this course is the consideration of propriety when writing. It reads:


In journalism, propriety is writing that uses good sense and good taste. As an Army journalist, it is your responsibility to ensure that your writing is in good taste and doesn’t violate the sensitivities of the community.

There are several things you should avoid in your writing.

  • vulgarity
  • gore
  • obscenity
  • lewdness
  • perversion
  • excessive violence (AR 360-5, Public Information, doesn’t spell out what “excessive violence” is. Use common sense and your knowledge of your community as guides)
  • information that holds the service or its members up to ridicule

Poor taste knows no bounds. It is just as wrong to quote a professional football player saying, “We’re going to kick their asses,” as it is to quote a soldier saying, “That FTX was really screwed up.”

I would fail as an Army journalist.

September 20, 2006

Probably My Greatest Invention Yet

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jason Christopher Hartley @ 4:17 pm

Egg Salad Sandwich
with capers and bacon

September 18, 2006


Filed under: Uncategorized — Jason Christopher Hartley @ 8:47 pm

On Being Ten

Thank you
For showing me
Your pet tarantula
In its glass case.
It was sublime.

Today in my American Literature class, we studied a collection of poems by William Carlos Williams. The professor for this course is an old hippie and it was a warm day, so we eschewed the sterile chair-desks and chipped linoleum of the classroom and sat in a semi-circle on the grass outside Old Main (all university campuses have a building called “Old Main”, I’ve come to realize).

Any poem longer than half a page is too long. But pithy aphorisms ensconced in heroic couplets are the domain of the English. Succinct and unadorned is what I like (or at least today that’s how I feel). Here was my favorite:

The Red Wheelbarrow

so much depends

a red wheel

glazed with rain

beside the white

-William Carlos Williams

We’ve covered a good deal of Robert Frost as well. What I’ve learn about Modern American poetry, in poem form:


All poems
about Spring

You can not disagree with me. My reason and opinions are unimpeachable.

May 31, 2006

Gun Porn

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jason Christopher Hartley @ 10:25 pm

M134 Minigun

Today someone emailed me a video so awesome, that after watching it, I had to troll the internet all day about its subject– the Minigun. Truth be told, I actually troll the internet for information on Miniguns several times a year. :)

Like all good video footage of machine guns, it is of course put to the music of Carl Orff and Metallica: video (5.9 MB)

M61 Vulcan

The Minigun (7.62mm) is a frightening weapon. And its higher-caliber older sibling, the Vulcan (20mm), even more so. It is always the sound of it firing that I find so arousing. The weapon roars–the rate of fire being so great that the report of an individual round firing becomes indistiguishable from the one before and after. In some configurations the rate of fire is as high as 100 rounds per second.

GAU-8 Avenger

The following paragraph (edited from the Nazarian’s Guns Recognition Guide) about the bizarrely powerful behemoth Avenger (30mm)–the weapon the A-10 Warthog was designed around– furthered my arousal:

A typical combat load would include 30mm Armor Piercing Incendiary (API) mixed with 30mm High Explosive Incendiary (HEI) called Combat Mix Ammunition. The ratio of API to HEI rounds in the Combat Mix is 4:1. Combat mix is a sequential mixture of Depleted Uranium (DU) and HEI rounds in which 1 HEI round is followed by 4 DU rounds when fired.

5.56mm handheld Minigun, or “Microgun”

The 5.56mm man-carried version of the Minigun never made it out of the research and development phase, despite it’s pop-culture appeal. The above photo is actually a 6mm BB-firing replica made by Airsoft. (It’s hard to find good photographs of Miniguns on the internet.)

The roar of the Minigun can be heard in this footage of the Avenger being fired in a test environment: video (4.6 MB)

For tons of more info, photographs, and videos, go to the Wikipedia entry for the Minigun.

It should be noted that although the 7.62mm version is the only one called the Minigun, all of these weapons systems are commonly referred to as Miniguns.

Oh, and one final thing. All these weapons were designed by General Electric.

February 24, 2006

Brian, Elizabeth, and Ricky

Filed under: Uncategorized — Jason Christopher Hartley @ 6:06 pm

Brian, Elizabeth, and Ricky
Family Portrait No.1 by Jason Christopher Hartley

This is my friend Brian Knauer, his wife Elizabeth, and their dog Ricky at my home in New Paltz. Brian is a painter and Elizabeth is an environmental lawyer. Ricky is a happy dog. He’s very popular at the dog run. They live in Brooklyn and have a house in Cairo, New York.

Family Portrait No. 1
Family Portrait No. 1 by Brian Knauer